A devotee asks about when he sits to do sadhana, dhyan, meditation, and after half an hour he starts feeling lazy. He starts getting bored. This happens. Why does this happen? Because of bad sanskars? What is the reason?
So, again, it has to do with practice and interest. So, there's something called ruchi. You know, ruchi - interest. We have to make it. Now, the mind initially is not going to be interested because we never practice sadhana in any special way. So, interest is not going to come by itself. We have to make interest. So, just keep practicing.
Look, there are two things: One is sanskar. We are governed by maya, three qualities of maya: sattva gun, rajo gun, tamo gun, and one of them is always predominating. Three of them are always there. One is predominating, and the one which predominates will determine our nature, how we feel. All right?
So, if the tamasic quality is predominating, we are lazy. We lack incentive. We don't want to do sadhana. We have negative thoughts about God and Guru. Reverse thoughts will come because tamasic (quality is predominating). So, the sanskars are very bad. When the rajasic quality is there, “Okay, I should do.” We do a little bit, and we feel all right, but not too much. Again, we get bored. And when the sattvic quality is predominating, oh, we get so much joy in doing sadhana!
Now, Shri Maharaj Ji is gives an example like riding a bicycle. Cycle chalate, hai na? So, if you ride a bicycle on a level surface, jitani mahenat karegi utni teji se jayegi, how much I pedal, (that’s how) fast the bicycle will go. Then we come to a hill (pahar). Ab sochne lage, kaise jayegi? How to climb is so hard, but if we make khoob mahenat karo, real effort, we climb the hill. It's hard, but we'll climb. And then you go down the hill the bicycle goes by itself. Ab kuch karana hi nahi. Koi mahenat nahi. Apane ap jayega. It'll go by itself, easily. So, when the sanskars are madhyam, when rajasic quality is predominating, this is bicycle on a level surface. How much effort we make, that much we'll benefit. When we come to the hill, this is a bad sanskar. Tamasic quality is predominating but if we work hard, we'll climb up. We'd have to do sadhana, do more that time. And when the bicycle goes down the hill, this means the sanskars are very good, sattvic quality is predominating. That (is the) time we want to do (sadhana).
So, like the hill especially, don't worry about the rajasic and sattvic, it’s the tamasic one, and don't worry about that too. Know that my sanskars are bad. But just like when the bicycle comes to the hill, we make more effort. Shri Maharaj Ji says that at that time do more sadhana. Don't give up! Nirash nahi hona haiya! (Don’t be disappointed.) “Oh, I don't feel good. I don't know I can't do!” No, now make even more effort; and because Guru is with you and he's seeing that you're making effort, he's going to help. So that time we make even more effort.
Their bad sanskars will come. We're under maya. This is from our past life. We have no control over when it's going to happen or for how long. Yah hamare bas mein nahi hai. That's going to happen. But the more effort you make, the more you practice, the more you'll benefit. That will go also eventually. Anytime you can sit down and shed tears. The moment you start chanting, “Radhe Radhe”, the tears will start coming. But that is a very high stage. Before that we have to practice. Abhyas karo abhyas. Aur nirash nahi ana. (Practice, practice and don’t be disappointed.) Don't let this thing come that I can't do it. There are days that things will be hard. The bad sanskars, don't worry about it; it'll go away. That time just do more sadhana. Thik hai. (Okay)
Question: Radhe Radhe, bhaiya. Whenever we do sadhana, at least we try to do roop dhyan. But when we do seva, how can we keep remembering God and Guru so that it will not just be a physical realm?
Answer: All right. So that's why Maharaj Ji says, “Seva is even more important than sadhana.” There's a reason. We could be sitting in the hall and chanting and our mind is all over the world. We're thinking about this thing. “I have to do this.” I'll be thinking about, “Oh my child!” I'm thinking about, “My mummy who's sick.”
We're thinking about all the things in the world and we're chanting, “Radhe Radhe.” While you're doing seva, think at that time, “Who I'm doing seva for? I'm doing this for Radharani, for Maharaj Ji, for Shri Krishna!” Right? Don't just do the seva, but think who I'm doing seva for. All right? That time you get the benefit. So, that time also (do) roop dhyan, but not roop dhyan in the term that you keep meditating. Just every now and again the thought comes to mind, “Ye kiske liya kar raha hu? Who am I doing this for? I'm doing this for, this is Maharaj Ji’s seva, Radharani.” Right? And that will help also Just bring the thought again and again.
Question: So, it's kind of contradicting for me. Maybe I'm not able to understand. So, one thing we say is to realize that how fallen we are. And then the next thing is to purify our mind, you know, 100%, the antahkaran. So, I mean, when we are purifying it, that means how does that ego or how can we get rid of that?
Answer: Okay, so the thing is that, that's why deenatā. Very important. Gaurang Mahaprabhu said, “First and foremost, trina dapi suni chena, to become humbler than a blade of grass.” How that will happen? When I realize that I am the worst of the worst. Instead of thinking lovingly about Radha, Krishna, Maharaj Ji every moment, I am thinking about foolish things in the world. It shows how dirty, how terrible, my mind is.
So, always feel that all the sadhaks are better than me. I am the worst of the worst. This will bring humility. Radharani, Shri Krishna, Maharaj Ji loves humility. We cannot become too humble. The more humble you become, the closer you'll get to Radharani, to Maharaj Ji. Always have that feeling, I am the most fallen. I am the most sinful and that will make you shed tears and that is what's going to purify the heart, the mind.
Question: Radhe Radhe, what about while dreaming? It seems that progress made in daily sadhana doesn't always correlate with dreaming - to think more of Hari Guru. Is there a way to increase that or does that just take more time?
Answer: Yes. Dreaming is not sadhana. Okay. Maharaj Ji says, “Do not accept the dream as anything real.” Our dream will only be real when we become Divine. Don't pay attention to dreaming. Dreaming is false, all right? Whatever we see in the dream, because we are under maya, because our mind is material. Ah, it's nice that in my dream I saw Maharaj Ji. I saw Radharani, Shri Krishna. It's very nice and that will happen because I'm thinking more about Maharaj Ji, more about Shri Krishna. So, I will dream automatically what I'm thinking about.
If I'm thinking sensual things, worldly things, I will have that kind of dream also. So, the mind takes our thoughts, and even from past thoughts, past lifetimes, and makes a movie and we call that dream. That is false. Don't think that; and that is not sadhana. Only what we do while awake is counted as sadhana. So, even if you kill somebody in your dream, you don't get punished for that. If that is real, then you'd guess what's going to happen to us! All right?
So, neither God nor Guru looks at the dream, okay? So, don't worry about your dream, only what you do while you're awake. When the sadhana you're doing while you're awake, that is what is counted, okay? The dream is a false world. Don't live in a dream world, all right?
